Chemo #7

More behind me, than in front of me! Chemo #7 is in the books. Due to the continued neuropathy I have been having in my hands, one of the drugs was removed from therapy sessions. So at least it’s shorter! It will most likely be removed for a few sessions, then reintroduced, in order to avoid any debilitating effects.

It’s hard to follow a blog entry like the one Paul wrote. I laughed, I cried, then cried some more when reading it. He brought up a lot of things that have been difficult for us, and I’m glad he did. This is the true test of “For better or for worse, in sickness and in health.” One of the positive things to come from this whole ordeal, is I have fallen in love all over again with my husband. I truly can’t imagine life without him. From the moment I had my diagnosis, I refused to accept any negative outcome, because I simply cannot leave him. As I often say to him, he is stuck with me. I recommend to anyone who wonders whether they have found their soul mate to ask yourself if in a few years they get sick, are you willing to change your whole life to support them? Are you willing to be strong when they cannot? Are they just as beautiful with a stinky colostomy bag hanging out from their shirt as the day you first fell in love? I am so fortunate I have that person in Paul. If you have that person, cherish them.

On a lighter note, Chemo#7 was a Willie Nelson themed event. I found a shirt online that said “Feelin Willie Good” and I just couldn’t pass it up! My good friend Beth came to join me, and we rocked some bandanas and listened to Willie the whole treatment long. Willie is definitely therapeutic. If you haven’t brought out an old album, or looked him up on Spotify in a while, I suggest you do. Paul’s favorite album of his is Phases and Stages, and I quite like it as well.

I liked how it worked out with my Willie session, as this whole recovery time has also been musically inspired. A few days after chemo, Paul and I had won tickets to a micro concert for Nathaniel Rateliff and the Nightsweats. It was at the Turf Club, which is a small venue here in St Paul and I haven’t been there in years, so it was a great to be back. The band just surrounds you with sounds of all kind. It was amazing. We found out they had been filming a video there all day, and when they played the song live they were just finishing up the filming. So perhaps we’ll be in a video! This past weekend we also went to Irish Fest, braving the heat to be engulfed by a different set of sounds and just all around positive feelings. I’ll complete my musically inspired recovery with Sam Smith tomorrow night, just before chemo #8! My right hand gal Kelly and I will be rockin out to his sweet, sweet falsetto voice. Can’t wait!

Music is such an amazing thing. It can be a drinking companion, a shoulder to cry on, a loving confidant, an inspiration for more, and magical presence that just takes you away from you day. While I don’t play music as much as a used to, I’m finding more and more how much it is pivotal part of my world, and hope it always will be.

On a final note, I can’t express how wonderful it feels to have someone randomly reach out and remind me that they love me. It’s such an amazing feeling, and I wish as a society we did it more. Someone does not need to be sick, or in need of comfort to tell them you love them. Friends, family, lovers. Whoever you love, tell them openly and often. It will make you both feel good.